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Tuesday, November 22, 2005
Olga brings Henry back to his old home - the wine cellar. "Whoa! Hey, stop! This is inhuman, you know. You ever heard of the Geneva convention? I mean, my, my, my toes -- I can't feel -- I think I have frostbite," complains Henry. "Keep dancing. Toes will be warming soon," suggests Olga. "Why the little sojourn to the tool shed, anyway, Olga?" asks Henry. "Punishment. You try to steal my keys. Also, you break many bottles. Must tidy up," says Olga. "What do you mean, tidy up? Why? Why? I thought the whole point was to make me as uncomfortable as possible. Unless you're trying to make it look like I wasn't here. Olga, someone came looking for me, didn't they?" asks Henry. "Time for Henry to shut mouth, and time for Olga to go," says Olga. "Olga, who was it?" demands Henry. "What you care? You are hoping they find something? Has Henry been a bad boy?" asks Olga.
Olga grabs Henry and he cries "No, no, no!" "Confess, Henery. Did you leave a clue for someone to find?" asks Olga. "Of course I left a clue for someone to find. I leave a clue for every hour I'm down here, Olga. I leave them, you clean then up. Why is today any different?" asks Henry. "Surrender. You cannot win," declares Olga. "I can die trying. No, stop! Scratch that. I don't want to die. And I don't want my sister to. You've forgotten about my sister, have you?" asks Henry. "Your sister will not die. You are watching too many movies," says Olga. "Yeah? Okay. I wish I could trust in your optimism. But, since it's bought and paid for by B.J. Green, I'm afraid I can't. Olga -- Olga, come on. I thought -- I thought we had an understanding, a connection? Whenever I talked about how much I love Maddie? I can't believe that you're capable of letting something bad to happen to that little girl," says Henry. "You are making mistake. Between Olga and Henery is no connection. Your sister is fine," says Olga. "Wait, wait, wait, wait. What do you mean? How do you know that she's fine? She was here, wasn't she? She's the reason you cleaned the place up," says Henry. "Enough with talking. I must go," says Olga. "No, wait, Olga. Wait, wait, wait. Come on, give yourself over to the compassion. Embrace it, it'll set you free. I know that you care about whether my sister lives or dies," says Henry. "Okay. Yah. Now I see problem," says Olga. "You do? Oh, you do. God bless you. God bless your soul -- your unfrozen soul," cries Henry joyously.
"Great, so now that you understand, you'll help me get out," says Henry. "I understand you think I am fool," says Olga. "No, no, I don't think you're a fool. I think you're very savvy," says Henry. "What is this, savvy?" asks Olga. "Savvy is smart. It's clever. It's clever enough not to be duped by B.J.," explains Henry. "What is this, duped?" asks Olga. "Duped? It's fooled. It's tricked. It's hoodwinked," says Henry. "What is this, hood..." "Okay, that's it. That's enough. Enough, enough. I thought you understood why I was so scared for my sister. I thought we got it here, but obviously you don't care. So, just leave me alone, all right? Let me just sit here and be by myself, and dream about being at Thanksgiving with Maddie and eating turducken," sighs Henry. "You mean turkey?" asks Olga. "I mean turducken, lady. Turducken, okay? It happens to be a very special dish to my sister and I. I should be spending Thanksgiving with her, not with you. I don't even know if she's going to make it to Thanksgiving. So, go, please, just leave me alone," says Henry. "Maybe. After you answer for me this one question. What is turducken?" asks Olga.
Henry opens a bottle of wine and explains: "Maddie was maybe five, we were having Thanksgiving together, it was just the two of us, I don't know where the rest of the family was. It doesn't matter. Anyway, she had all these questions about Thanksgiving." Henry takes a swig of wine and offers Olga a drink. She refuses, and Henry continues. "And it was like, 'why the pilgrims?' And 'what about the Indians?' And maize. You know, those kind of questions. Why this? Why that? And then she got to the turkey. 'Why the turkey? Why not a duck? Or a goose? Or even a chicken?' And she thought, 'well, maybe the duck and the goose are jealous of the turkey.' And I said, 'you've got a point there. In fact, the duck and the chicken have been plotting revenge for years against the turkey. What they decided they would do, is that the chicken would stuff itself into a duck, and then the duck, in turn, would stuff itself into a, well, I guess an abnormally large turkey. And then, that way, the meal would be even. There'd be no favorites.' Well, Maddie -- Maddie just thought this was the greatest idea she'd ever heard of in her life. So she demanded that we make this mea and we did. And the turducken was born." Olga asks if it was good. "No, it was god awful. It was, like the worst thing I've ever had in my life. It was horrible. But -- but Maddie loved it and had a great time. And she was happy. And so it was a great Thanksgiving. Sometimes it's not the meal that's important, it is the meaning of the meal. Come on, Olga. Let me out of here. Let me go spend Thanksgiving with Maddie. You know what? You can come with us. You can come spend Thanksgiving with us. You can even try some turducken. We've actually learned some tricks to make it very palatable over the years. I think you might even like it. What do you say?" asks Henry.
"What do you say, Olga? It's your last chance at sainthood and turducken," offers Henry. "Too many sins for to be saint. Also, I have allergy to chicken and duck," replies Olga. "You're heartless, you know that? You tease me into thinking I got through your shell, and then you just slap me in the face," says Henry, "You're just as evil as B.J. Get out." "What you need is rest. Go sleep. Sleep and dream of turkey dinner. Turducken. Crazy," laughs Olga. She leaves and Henry drinks to Maddie. "Maddie, here is to you. Wherever you are. I hope you're safe."
Today’s episode was directed by Maria Wagner and written by Josh Griffith.
Transcripts from TVMegasite Henry: Whoa! Hey, stop! This is inhuman, you know. You ever heard of the Geneva convention? I mean, my, my, my toes -- I can't feel -- I think I have frostbite. Olga: Keep dancing. Toes will be warming soon. Henry: Why the little sojourn to the tool shed, anyway, Olga? Olga: Punishment. You try to steal my keys. Also, you break many bottles. Must tidy up. Henry: What do you mean, "tidy up"? Why? Why? I thought the whole point was to make me as uncomfortable as possible. Unless you're trying to make it look like I wasn't here. Olga, someone came looking for me, didn't they? Olga: Time for Henry to shut mouth, and time for Olga to go. Henry: Olga, who was it? Olga: What you care? You are hoping they find something? Has Henry been a bad boy?
Henry: No, no, no! Ow! Olga: Confess, Henery. Did you leave a clue for someone to find? Henry: Of course I left a clue for someone to find. I leave a clue for every hour I'm down here, Olga. I leave them, you clean then up. Why is today any different? Olga: Surrender. You cannot win. Henry: I can die trying. No, stop! Scratch that. I don't want to die. And I don't want my sister to. You've forgotten about my sister, have you? Olga: Your sister will not die. You are watching too many movies. Henry: Yeah? Okay. I wish I could trust in your optimism. But, since it's bought and paid for by B.J. Green, I'm afraid I can't. Olga -- Olga, come on. I thought -- I thought we had an understanding, a connection? Whenever I talked about how much I love Maddie? I can't believe that you're capable of letting something bad to happen to that little girl. Olga: You are making mistake. Between Olga and Henery is no connection. Your sister is fine. Henry: Wait, wait, wait, wait. What do you mean? How do you know that she's fine? She was here, wasn't she? She's the reason you cleaned the place up. Olga: Enough with talking. I must go. Henry: No, wait, Olga. Wait, wait, wait. Come on, give yourself over to the compassion. Embrace it, it'll set you free. I know that you care about whether my sister lives or dies. Olga: Okay. Yah. Now I see problem. Henry: You do? Oh, you do. God bless you. God bless your soul -- your unfrozen soul.
Henry: Great, so now that you understand, you'll help me get out. Olga: I understand you think I am fool. Henry: No, no, I don't think you're a fool. I think you're very savvy. Olga: What is this, savvy? Henry: Savvy is smart. It's clever. It's clever enough not to be duped by B.J. Olga: What is this, duped? [ Imitating Olga's accent ] Henry: Duped? It's fooled. It's tricked. It's hoodwinked. Olga: What is this, hood -- Henry: Okay, that's it. That's enough. Enough, enough. I thought you understood why I was so scared for my sister. I thought we got it here, but obviously you don't care. So, just leave me alone, all right? Let me just sit here and be by myself, and dream about being at Thanksgiving with Maddie and eating turducken. Olga: You mean turkey? Henry: I mean turducken, lady. Turducken, okay? It happens to be a very special dish to my sister and I. I should be spending Thanksgiving with her, not with you. I don't even know if she's going to make it to Thanksgiving. So, go, please, just leave me alone. Olga: Maybe. After you answer for me this one question. What is turducken?
Henry: Maddie was maybe five, we were having Thanksgiving together, it was just the two of us, I don't know where the rest of the family was. It doesn't matter. Anyway, she had all these questions about Thanksgiving -- do you want a drink? No? And it was like, "why the pilgrims?" And "what about the Indians?" And maize. You know, those kind of questions. Why this? Why that? And then she got to the turkey. "Why the turkey? Why not a duck? Or a goose? Or even a chicken?" [ Henry laughs ] And she thought, "well, maybe the duck and the goose are jealous of the turkey." And I said, "you've got a point there. In fact, the duck and the chicken have been plotting revenge for years against the turkey. What they decided they would do, is that the chicken would stuff itself into a duck, and then the duck, in turn, would stuff itself into a, well, I guess an abnormally large turkey. And then, that way, the meal would be even. There'd be no favorites." Well, Maddie -- Maddie just thought this was the greatest idea she'd ever heard of in her life. So she demanded that we make this mea and we did. And the turducken was born. Olga: Was good? Henry: No, it was god awful. It was, like the worst thing I've ever had in my life. It was horrible. But -- but Maddie loved it and had a great time. And she was happy. And so it was a great Thanksgiving. Sometimes it's not the meal that's important, it is the meaning of the meal. Come on, Olga. Let me out of here. Let me go spend Thanksgiving with Maddie. You know what? You can come with us. You can come spend Thanksgiving with us. You can even try some turducken. We've actually learned some tricks to make it very palatable over the years. I think you might even like it. What do you say?
Henry: What do you say, Olga? It's your last chance at sainthood and turducken. Olga: Too many sins for to be saint. Also, I have allergy to chicken and duck. Henry: You're heartless, you know that? You tease me into thinking I got through your shell, and then you just slap me in the face. Olga: Whack! Whack! Henry: You're just as evil as B.J. Get out. Olga: What you need is rest. Go sleep. Sleep and dream of turkey dinner. [ Olga laughs ] Turducken. Crazy. Henry: Maddie, here is to you. Wherever you are. I hope you're safe.
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