|
|
Friday, July 15, 2005
Henry is sitting forlornly at the bar at Yo's. Carly walks in and says to him, "Business must be slow." "Yep, it's as slow as the I-75 at 4:00 in the afternoon. What are you doing here?" asks Henry. "Looking for Artie," replies Carly. "That's funny, so am I," says Henry, looking like he needs another martini. "Well, if life is so boring and business is so slow, then why don't you take that private eye job I offered you?" asks Carly. "Because, first of all, I'm retired. And second of all, finding a woman without a name is as easy as finding a martini olive in a pile of marbles," says Henry, eating one of the olives from his martini. "Oh, I've got her name. I even found the woman," boasts Carly. "You did? Wow. So, I guess you don't need my help after all," says Henry. "Oh, but I do, Henry. I absolutely do," smiles Carly.
"All right, sweetheart. Before we talk details, let's talk specifics. And by that, I mean the financial kind. Guys like me don't come cheap," says Henry. "Well, I can't pay you unless I know I can trust you," counters Carly. "Well, you're not going to be able to trust me until you pay me. I mean, remember, sweetie, honey, darling, you came to me," says Henry. Carly takes an envelope out of her purse. It's full of cash; Jack gave it to her to give to the bartender at Yo's for their anniversary party tonight. She hands it to Henry with a pained look on her face. "Will that cover it?" she asks. "Well, I just don't know why -- wow," says Henry, opening the envelope and taking out the cash. "This is like the movies. Who -- who walks around with this kind of cash anymore?" he asks. "We ran out of checks," says Carly. "Oh, that is so cute. You are adorable. Cash is just fine. Lady, you just hired yourself a shamus," says Henry. "Is that what I need?" asks Carly. "Sweetheart, I'm exactly what you need. Now give me the skinny," smiles Henry.
Carly has found out that the mysterious woman in the picture with her father is Iris Dumbrowski. Henry rings her doorbell, wearing a hat and carrying a bouquet of balloons. Iris opens the door with a drink in her hand. "Iris Dumbrowski? You are Iris Dumbrowski, correct?" asks Henry. "Depends. Who the hell are you?" says Iris. "Iris, I'm your dream come true. I'm about to make your millennium! May I come in? I'd like to tell you all about it," says Henry. "How about you tell me about it right here. Don't let the booze fool you, honey. I'm still as smart as a tack. So no funny business, all right?" says Iris. "Oh, madame, the thought never crossed my mind," smiles Henry. Meanwhile, Carly is hiding behind the bushes, listening.
Today’s episode was directed by Michael Eilbaum and written by Josh Griffith.
Transcripts from TVMegasite Carly: Hey, Kim, it's Carly. You're not gonna believe this, but I found her -- the woman in the picture with my father. I found her. Her name is iris Dumbrowski. And she gave me the runaround. She's lying to me. So if you can find out anything about her, Iris Dumbrowski, I'd really appreciate it. Something big is going on. Thanks, Kim. Business must be slow. Henry: Yep, it's as slow as the I-75 at 4:00 in the afternoon. What are you doing here? Carly: Looking for Artie. Henry: That's funny, so am I. Carly: Well, if life is so boring and business is so slow, then why don't you take that private eye job I offered you? Henry: Because, first of all, I'm retired. And second of all, finding a woman without a name is as easy as finding a martini olive in a pile of marbles. Carly: Oh, I've got her name. I even found the woman. Henry: You did? Wow. So, I guess you don't need my help after all. Carly: Oh, but I do, Henry. I absolutely do.
Henry: All right, sweetheart. Before we talk details, let's talk specifics. And by that, I mean the financial kind. Guys like me don't come cheap. Carly: Well, I can't pay you unless I know I can trust you. Henry: Well, you're not going to be able to trust me until you pay me. I mean, remember, sweetie, honey, darling, you came to me. Carly: Will that cover it? Henry: Well, I just don't know why -- wow. [ Henry whistles ] This is like the movies. Who -- who walks around with this kind of cash anymore? Carly: We ran out of checks. Henry: Oh, that is so cute. You are adorable. Cash is just fine. Lady, you just hired yourself a shamus. Carly: Is that what I need? Henry: Sweetheart, I'm exactly what you need. Now give me the skinny.
[ Doorbell rings ] Iris: Give me a break, will you? I'm coming. Henry: Iris Dumbrowski? You are Iris Dumbrowski, correct? Iris: Depends. Who the hell are you? Henry: Iris, I'm your dream come true. I'm about to make your millennium! May I come in? I'd like to tell you all about it. Iris: How about you tell me about it right here. Don't let the booze fool you, honey. I'm still as smart as a tack. So no funny business, all right? Henry: Oh, madame, the thought never crossed my mind.
|
